The One-on-One
What Are They?
Discipleship Definition: A spiritual experience in which one person influences
another by sharing God-given truth.
The goal of a 1-on-1 is to help a student grow closer to Jesus by building a
relationship. In other words, as they build a relationship with you, you help them build a relationship with Jesus.
The quickest and longest lasting growth we’ve seen in students is when group discipleship (core group) is combined with personal discipleship (the 1 on 1). Your job as a core group leader is to enhance discipleship for your students with 1-on-1s. There are two types of these meetings:
Why Do We Do 1-on-1s?
• God uses people to influence our lives. Spiritual maturity is a JOURNEY, and we need people to help us as we seek to know Christ more.
• Paul teaches us about generational discipleship. We are to pour into someone in such a way that they will in turn pour into others. We are to REPRODUCE ourselves as core group leaders by the time we leave.
“And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust
to reliable men who will also be qualified to teach others.” {2 Timothy 2:2}
another by sharing God-given truth.
The goal of a 1-on-1 is to help a student grow closer to Jesus by building a
relationship. In other words, as they build a relationship with you, you help them build a relationship with Jesus.
The quickest and longest lasting growth we’ve seen in students is when group discipleship (core group) is combined with personal discipleship (the 1 on 1). Your job as a core group leader is to enhance discipleship for your students with 1-on-1s. There are two types of these meetings:
- SCHEDULED – Necessary unless your core group only has 3 people. It is good to schedule a time to make sure it’s not crowded out by the business of life.
- SPONTANEOUS – should happen no matter what!
Why Do We Do 1-on-1s?
• God uses people to influence our lives. Spiritual maturity is a JOURNEY, and we need people to help us as we seek to know Christ more.
• Paul teaches us about generational discipleship. We are to pour into someone in such a way that they will in turn pour into others. We are to REPRODUCE ourselves as core group leaders by the time we leave.
“And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust
to reliable men who will also be qualified to teach others.” {2 Timothy 2:2}
Who should I do a one-on-one with?
EVERYONE should be met with.
• As soon as you get names and contact information, immediately start hanging out with anyone who could potentially be in your core group.
• You meet with the people you’ve collected. If you have returning students, you and your co-leader can decide who will meet with them based on relationship, interests, and need.
/types-of-one-on-ones
How is shepherding different than discipling?
Why do we make a distinction between discipling and shepherding? Why isn’t every student treated the same?
• Jesus did. He had 12 disciples, and an inner 3. It’s because we love the masses
that we focus on a few. It is a strategic use of our time.
• Relationship will be easy: less walls, more health.
• Content will be eagerly received, digested, and applied
• You can challenge them with more responsibility
Meeting with peers or older students:
“Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.” {1 Tim. 4:12}
Be encouraged! Timothy did it!
Spiritual maturity is not measured by age, but by our level of leadership. God has given you the gift of leadership, and the staff has affirmed that calling in each of you!
It won’t look like big brother/big sister but more like CLOSE friends.
• As soon as you get names and contact information, immediately start hanging out with anyone who could potentially be in your core group.
• You meet with the people you’ve collected. If you have returning students, you and your co-leader can decide who will meet with them based on relationship, interests, and need.
/types-of-one-on-ones
How is shepherding different than discipling?
- More PASTORING—more listening and counseling.
- Less content—more about the TIME {Jesus time!}
- Focus on helping them take the next step—knowing Christ more.
- Have conversations that help them move from UNBELIEF to BELIEF
Why do we make a distinction between discipling and shepherding? Why isn’t every student treated the same?
• Jesus did. He had 12 disciples, and an inner 3. It’s because we love the masses
that we focus on a few. It is a strategic use of our time.
• Relationship will be easy: less walls, more health.
• Content will be eagerly received, digested, and applied
• You can challenge them with more responsibility
Meeting with peers or older students:
“Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.” {1 Tim. 4:12}
Be encouraged! Timothy did it!
Spiritual maturity is not measured by age, but by our level of leadership. God has given you the gift of leadership, and the staff has affirmed that calling in each of you!
It won’t look like big brother/big sister but more like CLOSE friends.
Pastoring Students in Crisis
You are a PASTOR to every student in your Core Group
What is a crisis?
How do you handle these?
NOTE: In the case of a student who is suicidal, DO NOT LEAVE THEM ALONE! Call a staff member and we will come to you.
What is a crisis?
- Sexual Assault
- Eating Disorders
- PTSD
- Severe Anxiety or Depression
- Grief
- Suicidal Thoughts and/or Ideation
- Current Abuse
How do you handle these?
- ASSESS the situation
- ASK the student if you can get someone else involved.
- Peer support
- Pastoral support
- Professional support
- REFER them to staff who will help determine if they should be referred to further professional support
NOTE: In the case of a student who is suicidal, DO NOT LEAVE THEM ALONE! Call a staff member and we will come to you.